Coming Soon: El Chalten

This town doesn´t have a single square foot of paved road, but it´s
completely zoned out and the area they´ll be using for Main Street is
already a 4-lane parkway with a decorative median. It´s tucked right
into the Fitz Roy range of the Andes and dramatic snow-capped peaks
jutt up everywhere you look. Right now, there´s nothing to offer
beyond a modest system of trails providing access to the mountains,
but in five years it will surely be Aspen.

Unfortunately, the word is out and the tourists have a head start on
the contractors, which means four out of our five visits to the
coolest little bar/brewpub I´ve ever had the pleasure of patronizing
have been ruined by large groups of well-heeled, smugly-dressed,
over-fifty British tourists who delight in mocking the owners´
generous (and relatively skillful) attempts to address their
complaints about the menu in English. It made me want to start
swinging a two-by-four.

Enjoyed a gluttonous Thanksgiving feast with The Duchess at a
restaurant named after one of the Tierra del Fuegian Indians Fitzroy
kidnapped and and brought back to England for training in manners and
language (see "in vein of literary tradition stretching from Pygmalion
to My Fair Lady") only to see his efforts fail miserably (due to
several factors, not the least of which were the mid-20s male Indian´s
obsession with and frequent attempts to rape the adorable
12-year-old-girl-and-namesake-of-aforementioned-restaurant), inspiring
him to find a ship to haul their asses back to South America ASAP (a
role which was filled by a boat undertaking a scientific trans-world
voyage several years longer than what Fitzroy wanted to sign up for, prompting the
vigorously-Christian captain to tragically invite a young student
named Charles along to keep him company) where the dinners all actually came with sides rather than just being enormous chunks of meat on plates.

Got a little tongue-tied while trying to explain the American
tradition of Thanksgiving, and am convinced that I´ve forgotten some
very important part of it. I got through the part where we give
thanks for all our blessings on Thanksgiving because in late November
a few hundred years ago some Indians bailed out a bunch of hapless,
white settlers on the East Coast who were about to spend the winter
starving to death, for which we repaid them soon thereafter by systematically exterminating them. After that, I got stuck. Is there something more in there that I´m forgetting?